Relationships are a great gift.
Lately I've been feeling as if I'm greatly missing out because God hasn't placed them in my life. Specifically, the romantic ones. I've even gone to the extent of looking at other women in my life, wondering what the heck they've done so right that God has given them the gift of a beautiful union with another person. The evilness in my heart is exposed. I've only dated 2 people my entire life and I have never been in a relationship that I pursued with unhealthy motives or in perceived brokenness. So, in my head I was left wondering why God withholds things from me while blessing others.
God has been provoking a new way for me to look at all this. It is a gift to be pursued by God and this thought ignited a new focus and reality for me.
In this season, God is giving me a gift beyond any gift I've ever dreamed of. He wants to bless me with a heart that is content and at peace in all circumstances. He is giving me the gift of spiritual growth, truly being refined in this emotional circumstance. He is itchin to give me the gift of a heart and mind solely fixed on the freedom He brings. Gifts don't come any more real, essential and undeserved. And foremost, He is giving me the gift of a deepened relationship with Him. I'm so captivated by a God whose work is beyond what we first see or initially fathom.
Lastly, God has made it clear that while He offers these gifts to all of His kids, not many actually accept. I could easily find a shallow happiness in a relationship I decide to stir up. I want the gift that penetrates and shatters the core of humanities brokenness and disconnect.
I am greatly favored, as God is allowing this pain to form the beautiful gift of wholeness, unity, and wisdom in my heart.
I know, all to well, that wondering thoughts of why God does or doesn't do for the faithful who are holding out for that "special person". And so many gal-pals who keep asking, why are they alone? So much heartache can go into the tossing and turning of why this or why that. This is such an encouraging word for those people. You are right... it's a gift. Because if we truly believe God wants the best for us, then sometimes the best is to enjoy the season of time on our own, so that we can be the best for who He has for us... God brought me my special person the year I turned 30. And I promise you, I would have waited 30 more years if I had known the blessing HE had planned all along (sigh) :-)
ReplyDeleteThis is so great Caydin.
ReplyDeleteGod is really refining you it seems like. Just making you all about Himself first and not about anything or anyone else. I love it:)
I was once told by someone wiser than myself that an awful lot of opportunities to expand the Kingdom require a time commitment. It has been my experience that I have more time to do those things when I'm single and I will be more likely to pass them up if I'm in a committed relationship.
ReplyDeleteEven though it sucks sometimes, like people are commenting, being single is a gift. It allows you to pursue those things God is placing on your heart without holding back. If God is telling you to move to Antarctica you absolutely can (even though you will probably freeze to death).. Just keep looking to God and he will take care of you. :)
ReplyDeleteWe are in this together Caydin!! You are major bomb.com =) and I'm so grateful for the friendship that is beginning.
ReplyDelete"I am greatly favored, as God is allowing this pain to form the beautiful gift of wholeness, unity, and wisdom in my heart."
This is what it's all about...and while the journey isn't always fun...we come out being better women of God. Love you girl!!
I rarely meet anyone who has this perspective. It's strange. It's unnatural. It bucks against the status quo.
ReplyDeleteThat usually means it's a God-perspective. Not only is your situation a gift (albeit a frustrating, confusing and sometimes lonely one), God has given you a gift through the insight he's allowing you to have.
Since we had the little convo on Monday, I've been thinking a lot about it and you. Let's talk. I think I have some really encouraging things you want to hear.
ReplyDeleteand yet tonight you were surrounded by three guys all night
ReplyDeleteOne time someone told me, God doesn't promise us spouses. I think a marriage will be an avenue to express and model the love that Christ has for us. But let's deepen that love for Christ now, so it can overflow more and more, even before there's a husband to overflow it onto.
ReplyDeleteSometimes is sucks, and we don't have to be content with the circumstances, just in them. Praise God that he created that longing, and that he fills that longing. Let's keep searching Him out together, my friend
Loved this post. Really spoke to my heart. It also reminded me of Philippians 4:10-12.....
ReplyDelete10 I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity.
11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.
12 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.
13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Caydin, my dear, I was not subscribed to your blog until now for some reason and after reading this post, I am so bummed that I've been missing out on your words. I absolutely love this state of mind that you've described, it really speaks the amount of joy that you have in the Lord! love that.
ReplyDeleteThank you Caydin & everyone else who commented on this blog. Relationships are always a subject that needs to have perspective, shared ideas, encouragement, everything. I was greatly encouraged by everything shared above :)
ReplyDeleteAND you don't need a man! Rock it with friends, God, and having a wonderful being young & beautiful & available to do whatever you are called to!!!
God is jealous, too.
ReplyDeleteDavid I love your comment. It made me smile and feel a hug from God on my heart.
ReplyDeleteCaydin,
It only takes ONE man and ONE woman for a marriage. God may be saving your heart and your mind, teaching you, sharpening you, and allowing you to grow without having the heartache of poor relationships and lost relationships. And I believe God does the same thing in the life of that ONE man that He may have for you. Rest in Him. He can far exceed your expectations in bringing and preparing your mate. Prepare yourself to be the beautiful bride and wife that you long to be. And pray for who that ONE person is for you as well. It will be worth it, I promise.
It's no wonder that when love is described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 that love is described first as patient... Singleness is a gift, I have learned.
ReplyDelete"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven" Ecclesiastes 3:1